Why is it the things you want the most always seem just out of reach…
And the more you want them the more they become unobtainable.

As I move through time rhythm becomes my enemy. Constant symmetry of rhyme pounding this unchaining melody.

You see the true me… Inside im ugly, disfigured, and in self loathing agony. Unknown to most on the outside… But, I know I’m really not worth the attention I seek from thee.

Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss our love the most.

Often times we see ourselves as worthless, useless, ugly, unwanted,and unloved, and we need that special someone to really change our self image. But, what happens when that all changes… If the one you find changes their mind… How long can one hold on when there’s no desire to cling to their current reality? Is it even worth it?

thekaulbubble:

How do I tell myself that it’s all going to be okay.

Keeping hope is the hardest thing ever.

Only now as I close my eyes,
Do I embrace this world as it passes me by.
tip my hat as slowly I die,
unnoticed I shall bid my goodbyes.
All that we were fades away and flies,
I have become all I despise.
The pain of my shame…
There is no gain worth this.
“I love you my dear”
I whisper at the resolution of justice.

By: Me

Often, we never notice our own monsters within, but most of us have them. Granted, some are worse than others but, even A murderer on his way to the chair might say well at least I’m not a child molester… While a child molester sitting in his cell might think to himself at least I never killed anyone. Often times we live out our days thinking we aren’t so bad, but if we could see through the lens of truth we would never be the same. If we are lucky enough to catch a glimpse of our selves through that lens we are faced with a choice… Believe it be horrified and change, accept it and don’t care, or deny it and continue on. I now see my monsters… And cant believe all that I see. I just hope it’s not too late to fix the damage I’ve caused.

Can you be forgiven when you have destroyed her world? It’s like trying to curb the fallout after nuclear war. How do you say you’re sorry after everything has turned to ash, when you alone hold the burnt match?